October 8, 2022
Sometimes, I find expressing my heart in Spanish to be a little softer. English translation follows.
He asked Her:
“¿por que tenes miedo?”
en mi corazón hay pasión y dolor
amor y miedo
alegría y tristeza…
así es la vida
mi corazón es poderosa
intensa sensual
amable… independiente
en mi matrimonio sufrí abuso intimo… él no podría amar todo de mí…no respetó mi cuerpo
y las palabras no coincidían con sus acciones
“Las personas dañadas lastiman a las personas”
ahora
hablo las palabras…y siento
la picadura
como un escorpion…en mi corazón…
porque recuerdo cuando el amor era dulce.
mis ojos estan llagria… el que no puede amarse a si mismo no puede amar a otro…
él no era un mal hombre … simplemente fuera de contacto consigo mismo
pero
mi corazón está sanando…suave y lentamente
…quiero todo de amor.
¡Quiero sonreír para volver
a reír… y cantar!
mi corazón quiere bailar…
mi cuerpo quiere moverse
con un hombre
pero solo cuando hay confianza… respeto y amor…amistad.
las emociones de una mujer son difíciles de entender…habrá dificultades.
el corazón debe expresarse la…tensión es inevitable… pero podemos besarnos y reconciliarnos?
no quiero arrepentimientos
porque tú, querido, me inspiras—
mis instintos me preguntan:
¿Puedo confiar en que un hombre se mantendrá firme y enfrentará su propio miedo?
sólo el y Dios sabe la respuesta
y por eso rezo.
He asked Her: “why are you afraid?” in my heart there is passion and pain love and fear happiness and sadness... this is life my heart is powerful intensely sensual friendly...independent
in my marriage I suffered intimate abuse...he couldn't love everything about me... he didn't respect my body and his words did not match his actions "Hurt people hurt people" now I speak the words...and I feel The sting like a scorpion...in my heart... because I remember when love was sweet. my eyes are tearful... he who cannot love himself cannot love another... he wasn't a bad man...just out of touch with himself but my heart is healing...gently and slowly ...I want all of love. I want to smile again to laugh... and sing! my heart wants to dance... my body wants to move with a man only when there is trust... respect and love... friendship. a woman's emotions are difficult to understand...there will be difficulties. the heart must express itself... tension is inevitable... but can we kiss and reconcile? I don't want regrets because you, dear, inspire me— my instincts ask me: Can I trust a man to stand his ground and face his own fear? only he and God knows the answer and for this I pray. --
I love and appreciate when you share your thoughts in the comments!
Growing Up... 
Your Spanish, I must admit I am unfamiliar and don’t understand or speak it so I had to rely on the English translation. I am pondering your words and will respond in kind very soon. Our lives are in some ways connected by life and it’s experiences, others are the sense of familiarity and the urge to empathize not sympathize. We all have hearts that have been broken, because broken allows us to know the fullness of hearts filled with love and adoration. The Yin and Yang of life, good with bad, happy with sad, yes with no…None of these should ever include hatred and abuse. Trust, Truth, Honesty must be part of any foundation. Nina, you are brave, you are strong, you are ENOUGH! Thanks for allowing me to participate in your journey. 🤗😘🌻🙏🏻💚🍂🌾🍁☀️😁
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“We all have hearts that have been broken, because broken allows us to know the fullness of hearts filled with love and adoration.”
Charlotte I love this image! The idea that we have to break open in order to be filled up! 😊💓🌻😍
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Ella le dijo: “Yo también tengo miedo”.
Ha pasado mucho tiempo desde que permití que mi corazón anhela el amor. Lo que una vez fue vigilado y abierto libremente, ahora está sellado con hebras de protección contra el dolor y la traición.
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Nina, I used the translation app to assist me, here’s the English version…
She said to her, “I, too have been afraid.”
It has been a long time since I allowed my heart to yearn for love. What was once unguarded and freely open, is now sealed with strands of protection against pain and treachery. 🍂🌾🍁🌻🤗💚🧡❤️💛
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There is so much here to unravel! 😀 Protecting the unguarded heart…isn’t this “self-love”? The way a loving mother would protect her child against treachery? Allowing the heart to yearn for love…we keep our hearts caged don’t we. We don’t allow our hearts to sing…for fear.
Yes, we yearn for human love…is it because we feel love lacking inside ourselves? And if I yearn for something that is lacking in another…am I not setting myself up for “disappointment”…justifying my need for protection?
What if I shift my focus off receiving love from another human and just allow my heart to yearn “be filled with compassion or warm feeling”…I yearn for the other to discover love in their heart—to be filled so completely with love—and no longer be afraid. 🙏🏻🦋💓🤗
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As always, you open more doors and insights. Yearns I believe are part of the human experience either for something new or the things used to. You are correct I believe in the yearning for things we lack within but maybe digging deeper the lacking might be buried or uncharted. I will use myself as an example, I yearn for the kind of love I give, problem is being able to accept it. And, yes no one wants to be set up for failure. Love is simple and complex, exciting and scary. I have learned to love myself, imperfect as I am and perfectly the person God created. I am still learning new things, new insights and planning new adventures. We can’t expect others to fill us if we ourselves don’t know what we want filled with. “Love is a many splendored thing!” Thank you Nina for your response. I look forward to sharing more as time goes on. Take good care 🙏🏻🌻🍂🌾🍁🧡🤗
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Hi Charlotte!
“I yearn for the kind of love I give, problem is being able to accept it.” So really…you yearn for acceptance? Puts us in a vulnerable (able to be wounded) position. Scary…and yet possibly splendored. Venturing into the dark cave knowing there is a dragon guarding a precious gem…only to realize—we are the dragon! Or something like that…lol! I can totally relate (in my own way) to what you say.
Seeking someone like myself who is able to give the kind of love I give…but also understanding that they are probably just as scared too—and that their fear is buried or uncharted too. Complex and simple indeed! I just started online dating—something I was soooo against. But. It’s been a great learning process. Dating in my 50’s I realize just how little my ex and I knew about each other before we got married. We had different ideas about commitment. I thought the marriage would give us a safe container to reveal ourselves over time…
So now, it’s actually nice just taking things slowly and getting to others for who they are—and where they are in their personal journey. I’m feeling more confident to be myself knowing that I am not for everyone—I don’t take it personally. It’s a learning experience…and helping me to heal.
“We can’t expect others to fill us if we ourselves don’t know what we want filled with.”
Discover what we want to be filled with…and then fill ourselves from the deep wellspring within…so full we can overflow and share our love freely…then it just doesn’t matter if others are able to give us love. We will already have what we need…and then should someone come alongside…ooh da lollie!! 😍💘😍
I’m so glad this opens more doors for you, Charlotte! Our conversation definitely does for me as well. 🤗💓
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🤗💚🍁🌾🍂🧡🌻💛. I enjoy our conversations and growing friendship.
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“The sweetest thing in all my life has been the longing — to reach the Mountain, to find the place where all the beauty came from — my country, the place where I ought to have been born. Do you think it all meant nothing, all the longing? The longing for home? For indeed it now feels not like going, but like going back.”
C. S. Lewis (Till We Have Faces)
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Love this! Thank you for sharing, Charlotte! 😊
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Your heart speaks beautifully in all languages. 🌷 Healing can be such a beautiful and yet painful thing. It can take such time and in the end is so very worth it. Oh how we wish so to give it to those we care about…as a gift. But, the true work of healing, I think, is to sort it out for oneself. But, we can be nearby if they’ll let us be, a quiet reminder that I’m here with you, in this moment and all moments. Much love, Nina 🌷❤️
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“Oh how we wish so to give it to those we care about…as a gift. But, the true work of healing, I think, is to sort it out for oneself.”
Wise words, dear friend. And so healing is giving and receiving the gift first to ourselves…a most precious gift to cherish.
I so love this, Suzanne—“But, we can be nearby if they’ll let us be, a quiet reminder that I’m here with you, in this moment and all moments.”
Much love in return. 😘💓🦋🥰
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Nina, your words reflect honest feelings. Every day you take another step forward . . . even a very small one. I agree that each of us must love self before we are ever ready to love another. Be patient, for God is leading you to future blessings.
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Thank you always Mr. B for your kind words and blessings. You speak not only to me—but to all those who patiently wait on God. 😊🙏🏻
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